arghs. my big aunt called me just now. she made some brownies and want my dad to go and collect them. ok then i dont know how the topic got wavered till my tennis lessons. and i felt as though i was being interrogated. first, she ask me how much are the fees. and i hate myself now for being so dead honest with her. told her they were 15 an hour. and she thought i was having one-to-one lesson with the coach. i'm like no. it's 3 to 1. then she's like "tsktsktsk... so ex." i quickly defended myself and said "it's the same for my other friends with other coaches" next, she asked "the coach just toss the ball and you hit back uh?" i really didnt know how to explain so i reluctantly said "yarhhh sort of.." then she said "aiyo. like that you can go xiaogu's(smallest aunt) condo and i can toss the balls to you for free or ask xiaogu to play with you" i didnt know how to answer that. i cant possibly tell her that tossing the ball is like so wu liao. i need someone to return my shots. and playing with xiaogu, my lengthy follow-through will look stupid. i mean she'll be somewhat shock i guess which would in turn make me feel awkward. cause last time when i played with her, she did no follow-throughs. i mean that time we were just having a game of badminton style tennis. yes, i was using my wrist a lot. and i dont really think she'll be able to return my shots now. not that i'm being proud, but you need to run which makes you sweat a lot. i dont think adults really fancy running after fuzzy yellow balls. see my point? i dont mind playing with my aunt once in a while, i mean i would enjoy it but, i wont be improving or learning any new strokes anymore. besides, i dont think my big aunt would really toss balls for me la. okay back to the interrogation i had with her. i manage to come up with the reason that can be understood by most adults when they ask you why you need a coach. i said i need to learn the strokes. and she said "actually can ask the coach to teach you the strokes then you quit then you can practise yourself" i came up with another reason to defend myself once again, "i need someone to correct my mistakes." then she said "yuh lah. learn a bit the strokes already then can quit" i really had nothing to say anymore so i just said "uh..." which can also be heard as "ah..." so that sort of concluded the convo.

but the convo sort of made me upset and rather pissed off. i dont understand why people are so all-for piano lessons. like you can just learn how to curve your fingers and press the piano from your teacher and just quit and practise yourself. musical terms can always be read from books... if you want to know how a song sounds like you can always buy a CD but apparently people still have piano lessons with teachers all the way till diploma? for what i ask you? i mean it's almost the same for tennis what. in fact for tennis, you really need to know all the strokes. i mean i just finish learning my groundstrokes and people are telling me to quit. there's lots of other stuff out there like: volley (learning on fri), smash, service, topspin, dropshot, etc. like my aunts seem so ever supporting for my sis to learn piano. what's wrong with me learning tennis?? at least my mom's not against it but she holds the same thoughts that i can get my coach to teach me all the strokes then i can quit. i mean if i want to rush everything and get nothing learnt in the end therefore unable to play anything in the end, i might as well not learn. just rot at home and bury my head in my books and ramble about band. you really need time to master strokes. and it's no use just trying to practise yourself a lot cause like what ms sia says (though i dont like her but i have to agree with her on this point), "you're just perfecting your mistakes" and it's no use having my coach teach me all the strokes and me doing it all wrongly and end up unable to send a single ball over the net. so maybe i dont need to know the fancy strokes but i cant survive with just the plain groundstrokes.

i mean i do want to learn tennis badly. otherwise, why did i pay my own fees, look for my own coach?? and get my own racquet. and defend myself when people interrogate me. i mean if it was just something that i didnt want to learn (like what i use to learn), i'll just try hard to quit without letting my mom know cause i really dont like it. just let her think it's due to other reasons. i mean that's what i did with piano and abacus. if i didnt like tennis why would i try so hard to learn instead of my usual try so hard to quit? and if i like it so much, why cant i learn? i mean my sis dont even like her piano that much. if she did love it to bits and pieces she would have practised more and be more dedicated to it. i mean i cant practise tennis at home... (break the tv or the ball flys out of the window..) and i'm not rich or free enough to go down the courts daily and no one's free to play with me so often. i know it's expensive. learning piano is just about as expensive. and so why cant i learn tennis without people bothering me. and i'm paying my own fees. and i still have to pray that it wont rain on days i play tennis, otherwise i'll be disappointed that my lessons are cancelled. guess what i use to do. i always hope for it to rain when i have abacus so i can not go for lessons. i mean it's a stupid excuse but i do go to that extend. i really hate it when people try to bother or interrogate me about the stuff i do. and give me advises. i'm old enough to think for myself :(